How undefined relationships are fueling emotional turmoil in Gen Z and what you can do to reclaim your self-worth
“I thought we were building something special. We shared everything, our dreams, our vulnerabilities, even intimacy. But then, out of nowhere, I was left with, ‘I never promised anything serious.’ How did I end up here?”
Does this sound familiar? If so, you may have found yourself in a situationship, a term describing a relationship that feels like more than a friendship but lacks clarity, commitment, or direction. On the surface, situationships might seem liberating, casual connections free of traditional labels. But for one partner, they often become an emotional trap, filled with overthinking, heartbreak, and unresolved questions. According to the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, people in ambiguous relationships are 30% more likely to experience depression and 50% more likely to feel anxious, compared to those in committed partnerships.
What Exactly Is a Situationship?
A situationship is defined by ambiguity. It thrives in the gray area where one person enjoys the perks of companionship, like physical intimacy and emotional support, without offering commitment or clarity. It often includes:
- Regular texting or meeting up but avoiding defining the relationship.
- Physical involvement without emotional depth.
- One partner investing more emotionally, while the other keeps things casual.
The emotionally invested partner often hears phrases like:
- I’m not ready for a relationship.
- I’ve been hurt before; I can’t commit right now.
- You’re expecting too much, I told you I wanted to keep things casual.
These dismissive statements invalidate their feelings, leaving them to question their self-worth.
Hypothetical Stories: What Situationships Look Like
Story 1: Riya’s Endless Wait
Riya, 19, met Arjun, 20, on Tinder. They clicked instantly. Late-night calls, cozy movie nights, and flirty Instagram comments became their routine. But when Riya asked Arjun if they were exclusive, he replied, “I’m not looking for labels right now.” Months passed, and Riya kept hoping he would change his mind. Eventually, she saw a picture of Arjun on Facebook with another girl, tagged as “My Queen.”
Riya was heartbroken. She realized she was emotionally invested in a situationship while Arjun had already moved on without ever offering clarity.
Story 2: Karan’s Confusion
Karan, 22, was dating Priya, 21, for six months—or at least, he thought he was. They went on vacations together, exchanged heartfelt texts, and even met each other’s friends. But Priya avoided posting pictures of them on Instagram and referred to him as “just a friend” in front of others.
When Karan finally asked, “What are we?” Priya laughed nervously and said, “Let’s not complicate things. We’re just enjoying each other’s company, right?” Karan felt used and emotionally drained, left questioning why he wasn’t good enough for a real commitment.
How Social Media Normalizes Situationships
Social media platforms like Instagram and Facebook have played a massive role in glorifying casual dating. Viral trends and reels often trivialize the emotional toll of undefined relationships. Hashtags like #SituationshipProblems or #CasualDating turn heartbreak into lighthearted jokes, while influencers share vague captions like “No labels, no rules, just vibes.”
These trends create a dangerous narrative. They make detachment and emotional unavailability seem trendy, leaving young people confused about what healthy relationships should look like.
Dating apps like Tinder and Bumble further contribute to this culture. With endless swiping and options, commitment feels unnecessary. A survey by Pew Research revealed that 70% of Gen Z daters feel frustrated by the lack of clarity in modern relationships, often describing them as emotionally exhausting.
The Emotional Fallout of Situationships
The effects of situationships are far from casual. They often leave one partner emotionally scarred, experiencing:
- Feelings of Rejection: When one person invests emotionally but is dismissed with “I never committed,” it can lead to feelings of inadequacy.
- Trust Issues: Experiencing manipulation or dishonesty in a situationship makes it harder to trust future partners.
- Mental Health Struggles: Many report symptoms of depression, anxiety, and overthinking caused by the ambiguity. According to the World Health Organization (WHO), depression rates among young adults are at an all-time high, with undefined relationships adding to their sense of loneliness
How Parents Can Support Without Being Overbearing
Parents often struggle to help their teens navigate relationships without seeming controlling. Here’s how to strike the balance:
- Foster Open Communication: Let your teen know they can talk to you without fear of judgment.
- Teach Emotional Boundaries: Help them recognize red flags like breadcrumbing or gaslighting.
- Discuss Healthy Relationships: Share examples of partnerships based on mutual respect and trust.
- Encourage Self-Worth: Remind them that their value doesn’t depend on someone else’s affection.
For example, if Riya or Karan had open, non-judgmental conversations with their parents, they might have recognized the emotional toll of their situationships sooner and avoided further heartbreak.
Popular Searches Among Gen Z on Mental Health and Dating
Google Trends reveals that Gen Z frequently searches for:
- How to heal from a situationship
- Signs of emotional manipulation
- How to set boundaries in dating
- Why do I feel anxious after casual dating?
- Tinder horror stories
These searches highlight a generation grappling with emotional fallout and seeking ways to rebuild self-worth.
Q: How do I know if I’m in a situationship?
A: If your relationship feels ambiguous, lacks clarity, and one partner avoids defining it, you may be in a situationship.
Q: Why are situationships common today?
A: Dating apps and social media have made casual connections more accessible while normalizing emotional detachment.
Q: How can I recover from a situationship?
A: Focus on self-care, seek therapy, and surround yourself with supportive people who value you.
Q:What should parents do if their teen is in a situationship?
A: Educate them about red flags, encourage emotional boundaries, and offer non-judgmental support